


Conversing with the Dead

by Samayo_Kaze



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-04
Updated: 2016-10-04
Packaged: 2018-08-19 11:38:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8204887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samayo_Kaze/pseuds/Samayo_Kaze
Summary: Hello, the following are a collection of monologues immediately following the events of Reichnbach and then moving on covering the three years Sherlock travel around destroying Moriarty’s criminal network. This is placed from the view of a third person, a sixteen year old girl named Isabell who met Sherlock as a child and who, after being left orphaned went to him for help. Though he has become an addict by this point, Sherlock still can’t turn her away- knowing that she had nothing else. He took her in and cared for her, better than he cared for himself. He kept her well cared for, and in return she looks after him as he suffers through his years of addiction. Refusing to live with him and get picked up by Mycroft, she instead chose to enter the homeless network and provide information and someone to bounce ideas off of. She quickly became close to Lestrade after he helped her get Sherlock clean and took a likening to John immediately. These snapshots of time take place on the rooftop where Sherlock jumps, because that is where she feels closest to him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Wow this is depressing.
> 
> This chapter: First Goodbye

       Hey, Sherlock, I know umm, I know you don’t really do all this emotional stuff, but a, I have something I really need to tell you so I guess you’re just going to have to deal with it

for the next few minuets. Listen I know what you said, what you told John, and I don’t believe it. I don’t believe any of it. I know you Sherlock, there are times when I know that I

know you better that I know myself, and I know it wasn’t  lie. You were a brilliant detective, always observing, and I know it was real. That’s pretty rare anymore, me knowing what is

real or not. I only have two things I know are absolute truth anymore and they both involve you, funny huh. I know that you were absolutely brilliant, and that you always have been

and always will be to me, and that you love me just as much as I love you. No matter what happen, I will always believe those two things. And just so you know, even though I know

you don’t really care, I’m not the only one who believes in you. John does of course, and oh Sherlock this has been so hard on him, but Lestrade does as well. I know, it’s weird that I

find so surprising that he would stand up for you, after all he did it when you were being arrested, but I never would have thought that he would rip into the pair of super idiots like

he did. It was truly awe inspiring, I think you would have like it. I still haven’t seen Anderson, I really don’t think that he’s come back to work yet, it’s pretty funny. I really miss your

Sherlock, we all do, even Mycroft. He actually visited me the other day, I think he was lonely and mourning you. Now I know you two . . . greatly disliked each other, but you were still

brothers and he loved you- just didn’t know how to show it I guess. You two never could understand each other.  Wow, that took more time than I thought it would. I have to go now

Sherlock, I’m not really supposed to be up here but I had to come talk to you so. . . Just, one more thing alright Sherlock, you- it meant a lot to me back when we first met that you

agreed to take me in, and that you stopped using when I asked. I-that has always been really important to me, that you agreed to do that not because you wanted to work on the

cases that Lestrade brought you but because you wanted me to be happy, and I never really got the chance to tell that. So thank you Sherlock, for all you’ve ever done for me, it was.

. . it was a lot more than I deserved and a lot more than you had to do, so thank you Sherlock, and I love you. I’ve always loved you, and I always will.

 

Goodbye, Sherlock


	2. First Surprise

Hi, Sherlock, it’s me again. I’m sorry, I know I told you I was getting everything off my chest last time, but I just really didn’t see this coming. Sherlock I just don’t know what to do.

Why has everything had to become so much more complicated after losing you. I just- oh, but you don’t know what I’m talking about do you? Well, I’ll just tell you then. Mycroft

came to visit me again, he comes around all the time now it’s kinda really weird, but he asked me something and I just don’t know what to do. He used to swing by and ask after me,

how I was doing and if I was eating and sleeping and stuff. I guess the trouble really started when he asked me about my family. You know all about THAT can of worms already so

I’m not going to get into it again but I didn’t really know what to say. I mean, I know I had to have had a family at some point, or parents at least, but you were the only family I’ve

ever had so, that’s what I told him. Not in those words of course, but I told him that I didn’t have a family. I told him that all I had had was a brother, and that he had just died

recently. He, of course, offered his apologies but I told him that it was okay and not to worry about it. I though that was the end of it, but now I see it was definitely not. He must

have checked it out though, to see if I was telling the truth or maybe just to make sure I wasn’t pulling a you and living homeless to get back at my caretakers or something. He

asked- Sherlock, Mycroft, he asked my permission to adopt me. Ya, what the heck right? I mean, what do I do now? Should I say yes, should I say no, why is he even offering? I

thought he hated, well not hated, but disliked people in general. He hasn’t even been creepily stalking me, well he has been watching me but it is decidedly not-creepy for Mycroft.

So, what do you think, should I agree? I know that you really don’t like him, but that you would also want me to be looked after and taken care of, because that is the kind of brother

you were to me. And yes, I meant brother. You’re the closest thing I had to a family, so your opinion really matters to me on this. I, I just don’t know Sherlock, I just don’t know. I

haven’t talked about this with anyone else yet, I probably won’t anyway. I know they care, but . . . they’re just not family like you were. But then I guess you can’t really give me

advice anymore can you? Maybe, maybe I’ll ask Lestrade. We’re pretty close now, he’s kinda like my uncle and he has prior experience with your brother so I guess it would be a

good idea to talk about this with him. I don’t know, I just- uh oh, sorry Sherlock gotta run, I think the guard just saw me.

 

Bye Sherlock, I love you.


	3. First Arrest

  *       Hey Sherlock, yeah I know, I’m back again. I’m sorry I keep showing up like this, you would hate it if you were still alive. I hope you’re
  * doing well, wherever you are, and that you don’t have to deal with too many idiots. I heard what you said up here, with Moriatry. I had to
  * break into several high-security government places before I finally found it, but I did. You probably wouldn’t have wanted me to listen to
  * it, but. . . I just really needed it. I needed the closure, I guess is what it was. I’m glad you know, not that you’re dead of course, but that
  * you cared enough about us to be willing to do this. That’s . . . if the others knew, they’d be so touched. I haven’t told them yet, none of
  * them, and I won’t. I know you wouldn’t have wanted them to know about what happened and I respect that, but I’m really worried
  * Sherlock. Lestrade was demoted, and almost fired completely, Mycroft has disappeared completely, and John, John is worrying me the
  * most. He’s almost vanished, Sherlock, I never see him anymore. I don’t hear from him, he wont let me visit, and I don’t think he’s been
  * eating. Last time I snuck into the flat to check up on him, he was so thin and just curled up on the sofa, crying. He looks terrible
  * Sherlock, but I don’t know what to do. He won’t except my, any help. Lestrade isn’t doing to bad anymore, he went back to his parent’s
  * house for a little while after- after your death, but he’s back now. Civilian life doesn’t seem to suit him very well though. Mycroft, he, I
  * don’t even know anymore. After I refused his offer of adoption, have I told you that yet, he just kinda withdrew. I started seeing him less
  * and less and now I don’t see him at all. He even changed his phone number, for goodness sake, what does that even mean? Did I upset
  * him because I refused the adoption? He didn’t seem upset, but was he just hiding it? I did talk with Lestrade about it, and he said that I
  * should do whatever I felt was right, and not to be pressured into anything. He also told me that even if I chose not to accept, Mycroft
  * would still look after me. Lestrade told me that your brother feels some kind of responsibility for my now that you’re gone. I’m not sure
  * if that was supposed to make me feel better, but it did. I know the two of you had a bad past together, but I think that he really did care
  * for you deeply. He just didn’t know how to show it, I think. You two didn’t seem to have gotten a lot of social anything as children, so I
  * think you two turned out fairly well. You did go down a bit of a rough patch for a while, but it got sorted out well enough. It’s kinda
  * funny actually. I think I might be the most messed up by all of this. I know John is in a bad place, but I also know that he’ll get out of it
  * alright. He has Mrs. Hudson and his job, so he’ll be fine eventually. It really feels like I’m the only one who doesn’t have anyone. All I really
  * ever had was you, and now that you’ve left I just don’t know what to do, who to go to. Did you know I haven’t even visited your grave yet.
  * I still can’t even look at the cemetery. It’s pretty stupid, isn’t it. I just don’t, I miss you Sherlock, really bad. I just miss you.
  * Ah, sorry- gotta run. Love you, bye Sherlock




	4. First Bail Out

  * Hahahaha, I’m back again Sherlock. Don’t worry, this one is a funny visit. So you now that I took off pretty fast last time, well that was because I saw the security guard coming and I didn’t want to get hauled downstairs for being up here. Didn’t do much good thought, guy still caught me. I was almost out thought, so at least there’s that. Of course, Lestrade was less than happy with the fact that I listed him as my next of kin, probably because I added to his already massive pile of paperwork. He’s been demoted you know, because of his involvement with you, but he isn’t upset. Well I mean he is, but its at Donovan and Anderson if anyone else, though I’m pretty sure he’s ticked at Mycroft too. Anyway, I was racing through the building trying to avoid at least half the total number of guards/ cops here by this point and was laughing so hard I could barely breath. I must have gone through six or seven _floors_ before anyone got close to grabbing me and **it was on accident!!!!!!!** I was sprinting though a hall and someone opened a door and the two of us collided, hard. We just sat there for a moment-blinking and looking stupidly at each other- before I heard the others coming around the bend a few corners back and I got up off the floor and said, “Oh, so sorry about this, ah but I have to dash.” Then I patted my pockets and continued with, ”Ah, I think I left my I.D. in the wall.” He just stared at me, must have been really new- now I’m wondering if it that was his first day, as I took off again just as the first of my followers rounded the last corner. I was literally sliding out of the place when that really stuck up guy that replaced Lestrade grabbed my jacket and hauled my up by my collar. Guy arrested me for a bunch of bogus charges, the only ‘rule’ I’d broken had been resisting arrest. I am actually allowed up here you know, but only with my I.D., which as previously mentioned is somewhere in the wall and I really should find it at some point. I just like to avoid security because it’s fun, plus I’m doing them a favor really, keeping them in shape. So anyway, I got dumped into a holding cell, nicking several pairs of handcuffs and a badge or four on the way. I even got one guy’s cell phone. Then they shoved a clipboard with the usual paperwork in, with a pen of course, and I set to work filling it out with the most ridiculous and yet completely true answers possible. Their faces were hilarious. It was like, **Occupation:** _Keeping idiots alive while hiding from the government_ and **Residence:** _Whichever of my friend’s flats I haven’t broken into for a while._ My favorite was **Next of Kin:** _Six and 1/2 feet under a mountain of paperwork with the forever lost nameplate that once said Jeff Lestrage or something like that._ My smile got bigger every time I saw them twitch. By the time they had dug Lestrade out and gotten him down to the cell, my smile was miles past maniac and little laughs, half hysterical half insane, were slipping out. He was looking pretty worried when he walked in, but as soon as he saw who it was he started twitching, turned around and went back out the door- shutting it behind him. I lost it and literally collapsed with the force of my laughing. It took me almost five minutes to stop, and then it was only because I couldn’t breath and things were starting to go all fuzzy and out of focus. Lestrade came back in after I had stopped laughing and only looked at me for a second, probably to make sure they didn’t pull me in off the street for something stupid, before asking in this really resigned tone what I had stolen this time. This set me off on a new round of snickering as the group of arresting officers looked at each other nervously at the news that I was rather light-fingered. Just then, the poor officer whose phone I had flinched stuck his head in the door shyly and asked if anyone had seen it. He was so adorable, I felt bad for stealing his phone. The other idiots looked at each other and told him that no, they hadn’t seen his phone. Lestrade hadn’t taken his eyes off me, so he saw my slightly guilty expression. I looked at him, and he just raised an eyebrow at me like he was asking me, really had you nothing better to do? I really hadn’t, but I wasn’t going to tell him that. Last time he made me do paperwork. So I provided the very put upon sigh that he wanted to release but couldn’t and handed over the previously missing phone. Everybody was shocked, of course, except for Lestrade, who had expected as much when he saw me in here. Then, he had the nerve to glare at me, as if demanding I had over whatever else I had taken as well. He was so annoying about it. I wouldn’t have handed my little treasure trove but I was tired and hungry, and just wanted to get back over to Baker street for a nap. So, grumbling so Lestrade was informed that I was very disagreeing with giving up my fun before I could hide them in random places, I handed over the other things I had taken for revenge of the arrest. Then he smirked at me, **Smirked at me of all people!! Then he just turned around and left, just like that.** What did I ever do to him to deserve that? Anyway, so he left me down there, and everyone else was leaving for the night so I figured that I would just have to wait until morning to get out. It really wasn’t that big of a deal, I could wait the four or five hours until morning came even if I was tired, hungry, and freezing. But then it can never be that simple, right? I ended up spending another week down there before anyone remembered I was in the cell. I’m fairly certain he feels really bad about that, by the way. I don’t exactly remember when he came down to get me, but I do remember his desperate apologies as he hauled me out. I was running on empty when I got there to begin with, so those extra days were hard on me. They definitely wouldn’t have forgotten me under normal circumstances, but the press has been a nightmare recently what with the anniversary of your dea- of the fall. Wow, it’s been a year without you already? It doesn’t feel like its been that long, but I guess that’s because I still come and talk with you. That, and everybody has been slammed with work all of the sudden. You know I actually had to break out of Lestrade’s flat to come see you today? It’s really a bit ridiculous, like everyone expects to see my broken body on the front page of the news paper every morning. They’re all idiots, of course. I would never do that out of something as stupid as grief. Plus, you would be so mad at me if I did anything like that. John is doing a lot better now, he’s even started working back at the clinic. He’s still sad, but I don’t spend my nights searching rooftops for him anymore. It’s a bit hypocritical of me I suppose, but then he isn’t like me so really anything could happen. Apparently I was pretty hysterical when Lestrade got me out of that cell, because he confronted me earlier about some things I don’t remember telling anyone, some of them I never even told you. He asked me about our first meeting, about the time I spent with you back when you were still using, he even confronted me about where I was always disappearing off too. I was mad about it , mostly because it’s none of his business, but I also understand that he’s just worried about me. I know he’s trying to be strong for me and John, but he is absolutely terrified that one day he’s going to get called out to a crime scene and one of us is going to be the victim. I keep reassuring him that that would never happen, but when he finds me thrashing and screaming during a nightmare and then holds me the rest of the night as I shake and cry I know he doesn’t believe me.  Ah, sorry. I told you this wasn’t going to be sad. It’s okay though right, to still be sad. I’ve started spending more and more time back with my family now. I really hadn’t noticed how much I had change after meeting you until I when back for the first time. Everything felt so different that I wasn’t sure what to do. I wonder if this is what John felt like right after he returned from overseas. I just didn’t know how to interact with anyone anymore, they were all so childish. Things are pretty okay now, but there are still times where I just stop and am surprised by their innocence. It makes me smile, remembering and really seeing just what we suffered for.  I should go, I’ve been up here for a long time and I’m sure Lestrade is getting worried about me.
  * Bye Sherlock, I love you brother.




End file.
